THE MONSTEROLOGY HANDBOOK:
A Practical Course in Monsters
written by Dr. Ernest Drake
edited by Dugald A. Steer
Candlewick Press
ISBN: 9780763646226
Ages 9-up
80 pages
THE MONSTEROLOGY HANDBOOK is designed to educate students who have recently arrived at Dr. Ernest Drake’s newly established Sanctuary for Fabulous Beasts in St. Leonard’s Forest, Horsham, for a three-month-long stay. The year, it should be noted, is 1905. The aspiring monsterologist must begin by taking an oath swearing to protect all monsters and beasts, never revealing their hideouts to unbelievers or to those who seek to exploit them, and studying them only for the sake of science. A provisional license that a student can fill out with his or her own name and photograph makes the process official.
The handbook consists of four sections: dealing with beasts of the Earth, another for beasts of water, a third for beasts of the air, and the final for dealing with semi-human beasts. Thus, the classification is based on habitat rather than on their biological features since the purpose of the book is to prepare one to encounter the beasts in their natural surroundings. Each lesson comes with a homework activity to be completed at a later time --- for once, kids will actually look forward to doing homework. Each section contains fascinating details about “supposedly” mythical beasts. For instance, did you know that the chimera’s three heads (goat, snake and lion) do not “see eye-to-eye”? Or that the shy anteater-like baku can devour nightmares and induce calm?
This volume is crammed full of utterly valuable tips for the aspiring monsterologist. One will learn that it is never a good idea to try to trick bigfoots by wearing a monkey suit to sneak up on them (they will not be amused). A good way to calm down a screeching baby yeti is to feed it ice cream to cool it down, whereas baby unicorns need a steady diet of pomegranate juice until they are five months old. Sensible students will learn that sailors would be wise to stay away from a scylla since they form the monster’s favorite form of food. It also turns out that everyone would be wise to stay away from the bison-like bonnacon since its main mode of attack is by spraying flesh-burning, venomous dung. As it so happens, there are many perfectly good uses for bonnacon dung, such as dissolving metals (“such as locks”), curing tough dragonhide to make it soft and pliable, and effectively clearing the groundcover in any area for several years. An especially valuable section of the book deals with learning to spot real monsters from the fake ones. One must always be wary of stitches, glue, paint, too many suspiciously identical bones, and those asking for money.
Gorgeous color illustrations scattered throughout the book, small envelopes holding surprises, four pages of stickers, diary entries from Dr. Ernest Drake himself, and many other neat features make THE MONSTEROLOGY HANDBOOK a natural for kids. This is a brilliantly imagined and beautifully executed book designed to give both adult and child readers many, many hours of pleasure. But be warned: this utterly engrossing take on mythical monsters may just make a believer out of you!
--- Reviewed by Usha Reynolds (Usha_Reynolds@hotmail.com)
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